Two Jews Walk Into A Theatre

I went to the box office of the Sydney Opera House with my wife – we were two Jews attempting to walk into the theatre – but the front of house lady could not see our name on the list. No matter how hard I tried she would not budge, so it was looking like two Jews walk out of the theatre.

Finally we were let into the performance of Two Jews Walk Into A Theatre to see two men sitting on chairs on a blank stage. The two grumpy and cantankerous fathers argue and graze over a range of subjects – sometimes very funny and sometimes irritating. On the floor were large pieces of butcher paper with what appared to be hand writing on it but I am told it was the score.

Their efforts to localise the play by describing their experience as actually sitting in the Opera House gave the performance the feel of it being improvised. This wasn’t helped by the long pauses and the two men occasionally speaking over the top of each other.  They were most animated when arguing over the State of Israel - one lambasting Israel for the its treatment of Palestinians, the other accusing him of being a self-hating Jew.

Then came a tell-tale sign that a play is not quite working. I fell asleep. When the snoring started my wife took the emergency measure of elbowing me in the ribs.

I insisted that I barely missed any of it but was merely resting my eyes.

I was glad she woke me up. There was great relief when these two dancers stopped talking and starting moving.

The two spectators became performers. Their very quirky and amusing choreography with bucket loads of wit was everything the dialogue was not.

They should have danced more and spoken less.

David Spicer

Photographer: Anna Kucera

Comment from the publicist. The play is improvised.