The Candidate

Mandy Nolan is a big woman – big presence, big voice, big personality.  Pillar box red dress and cowboy boots.  A comedian for twenty years, she was selected by the Greens to run as their candidate for Richmond (Northern NSW, Northern Rivers) in the 2022 Federal election.  At first, she said no.  She’s a comedian not a politician.  But she has ‘profile’ in the electorate - and she’s a magnetic, attractive, what-you-see-is what-you-get, funny woman.  Asked again, she agreed – after all, she agrees with the Greens’ policies and agenda – particularly on climate change (despite sneakily driving a diesel Jeep).  But then began all the irksome requirements and preparation – and some nastiness.  Door knocking – for one-on-one conversations – plus appearing on the streets, in supermarkets, plus the need for ‘correct’ attire (‘Mandy, you have to wear a jacket.’), and the ‘probity report’ – a twelve-page form about her past.  What would – or could come out? 

What about that night - years and years ago, but still - after a gig, when Mandy was picked up in a bar by a sexy woman and taken home with her – only to find the woman’s husband was on the couch – and stayed there – while Mandy went upstairs and had to take direction and do all the work…   Up for anything, our Mandy.  That was probably a one-off – before marriage, five children and eleven years’ continuous breast feeding.  Years later, she runs into the husband who stayed on the couch…  But you have to see the show to find out what happened.

Anyway, Mandy hurled herself into campaigning, knowing full well that the northern part of the electorate was (and is) rusted on for the Nationals and the Shooters, Fishers and Farmers Party.  The southern part includes Mullumbimby and Nimbin – a hippier and counterculture community. 

It was exhausting.  There was a lot of trolling and heckling and vandalism.  Mandy has one of her corflutes on stage: photo of Mandy (looking rather more respectable in a jacket, and ‘normal’ than she actually is) with the traditional usual cock and balls in Texta on her face.  Funny, eh?  Her opponents up to their usual witty tricks.  One surprise, however, was a morose farmer who said he was going to vote for Mandy despite disagreeing with all she stood for.  Why?  Because in thirty years as a voter, no one had ever asked him what he wanted – and Mandy had.  She campaigned hard on climate change and then, in the middle of all this, came the horrendous floods.  What better evidence, what better proof could you have?  People lost everything.  Politicians came in late for press conferences, not help.  The community mostly saved itself.

Nevertheless, Mandy lost by 2%. The Candidate tells her story.  Her disappointment is palpable even while she finds a whole lot that’s funny in the preparation, the campaigning and the stress.  Her humour is wry and dry, and her unstoppable personality carries us over the fact that her show is as much political agit-prop as stand-up comedy.

Michael Brindley

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